Spring has Sprung

Posted March 25th, 2009 by wease

Well its official... Spring has sprung!

And how do I know you might ask? Well, I am not one of those factonistas, you know those cultural elites who read about things in books. Nope, when I want know when spring is I don't check a book, I check my gut.

Spring happens when my gut tells me its time to shave my legs.

Roadie 101

You see, I have a deep dark secret. I live a double life. When I am not a bike=transportation addict, I'm a roadie.

Yes, you read right. One of those horrible evil people you see riding around with packs wearing all sorts of ugly spandex.

Mario we love you

And as part of a long standing tradition, for better or worse, to be a roadie, you must shave your legs. Why? I won't give you any BS about reducing the chance of infection if you get road rash (i.e. crash) or that shaving your legs makes it easier to get muscle massages.

Nope. The real reasons are tradition and aesthetics.

Put enough time riding and your legs can become quite cut and defined. What better way to show off all that hard work, than putting it on display. Doesn't matter if you fast, all that matters is that you look like you could go fast. Its like the age old dynamics between competing bucks. You want to posterior and position yourself against your opponent, without hurting yourself too much in the process. Half of competition is looking the part. If you roll up with harry legs, no one will take you seriously.

The aesthetics side of things come down to the fact road-specific cycling clothing is form fitting (as proper road attire should be). As such, it can look pretty funny when you are trying to look the part (i.e. slick and speedy) only to have it all ruined by an unsightly mass of hair popping out from under your form-fitting shorts. Considering the sheer amount of hair the male body can produce any hope of aesthetics can quickly be ruined if not kept tidy.

As for women roadies, the choice is theirs whether or not shave their legs. However for roadie men, the rules are not so lenient. I didn't look this up in a book... I checked my gut.

When the winter doldrums ends

This is how I know the winter doldrum has ended and a new season of riding in the sun is about to begin. I suddenly get the inspiration pull out the razor and off comes the the hair as I know its time to expose the legs.

Well today was just such a day.

The male body can produce obscene amounts of hair

Now here in Vancouver, BC we have had some sunny days before, especially in February. The less astute would be quick to jump hoping that summer was just around the corner. But I knew those siren calls were simply a pagan trick to get my razor out pre-maturely. Nope, I waited patiently until I knew the time was right.

I am not quite sure how I know when spring occurs, it is just a gut reaction honed over the years. Anyway riding home from work today, I had just such a calling and I knew what had to be done.

I pulled out the the razor and went about removing the copious amounts of leg hair that had accumulated over the winter season. Then with the burden of the extra weight removed, I knew I could go once again start to go fast. I jumped back on my bike and went out for a hard paced 3 hour ride.

With out all that hair weighing me down I was able hammer out some loops around Stanley Park, followed by an all out attack of Cypress mountain (where I only paused to grab the panorama below - wouldn't want you all to miss out), and finished off with a hard paced Horseshoe bay out and back.

Yes, in deed spring is has sprung.